by dishpantheism

driving home from my father’s cabin this evening with a blinding moon in the rearview. iridescent eyes in the margin. a doe scrabbled down on backward knees and crossed under the lowest strand of barbed wire fence. her agile stotting wasted like that.

a while back my dad gave me an estwing hatchet he’d found on a hill near his cabin. it’s very old. i’m refinishing it. he gave me a cache of old cast iron skillets and dutch ovens. griswold and wagner. some of them close to a hundred years old. i can only cook with cast iron else i burn everything. i’ve been using an electrolytic bath to remove the years of rust. current and sodium carbonate solution. a sacrificial anode. the rusty water is given to the pumpkin patch. ferdie cat is eager to help with these goings on. 









went to the mountains. met a few interesting folk. on the first night someone in a nearby camp played the fiddle until late. someone else sang unaccompanied. there was a campfire of jeffrey pine that smelled like butterscotch and vanilla. a family of great gray owls singing down from the trees. spent a few days walking the western sierra. a few days walking the eastern. revisited mono lake and saw an osprey nest. goldenrod and asters blooming. rabbitbrush too. ate rose hips. pocketed columbine and sneezeweed seed. dipped toes in a hot creek. successfully avoided being boiled alive in the hot spring itself. climbed in a cave. sifted squirrel mounds for arrowheads. 

got my pre-employment physical today. jabs for the tb test. the nurse admired her handiwork and said “oh what a perfect circle!” as the serum bubbled up under my skin. i can’t even see it now. fleeting.

big imminent things. scary. time speeds up. i feel overwhelmed by it. i think these are tasks for two people. or maybe two lifetimes. had a conversation about genetic chimeras in the back of a van. sister always jokes that i was two before i absorbed my twin in the womb. sounds like something i’d do.