by dishpantheism

i’m beginning to have doubts about sister. i just found out she isn’t really a fan of raspberries. she gave me a bag of them from her farm basket. she’d frozen them because she couldn’t eat the bulk of them. i very happily took them off her hands. they have been the best thing about the past week. 

i have most all the makings of a bad country and western tune. car crash. pain. termination of employment. and tomorrow i have to put my dog down. as my gran would say if it ain’t but one thing it’s another. oh and the job interview i thought i’d absolutely nailed did not in fact net me a job. i did get a letter in the mail offering promise of another though. i’ve given up crossing fingers as it doesn’t seem to do the trick.

i did some writing so that was good. it felt necessary and it hasn’t felt necessary in a number of years. but i’m not going to bank on the feeling sticking around. i just very much hope that it does.

i visited my father’s cabin and he gifted me with a book about mobile houses. narrowboat conversions and sailboats and sheep wagons. things like that. it did cheer me up some. i still sketch tiny houses in my notepad using an architect’s rule. always drawn to scale. it is nerdily satisfying. 

unexpected notes from friends geographically distant and invites to gawk at bones in the big city. and others from more nearby friends urging my speedy mending. those were cheering too. and i appreciate them very much. when i am mended enough for train travel i will hie away to the big city and drink tea and ogle the beautiful contours of many a bone.

i picked sweet corn from the garden. something has been at the stalks. probably raccoons. several stalks lay on their sides with ears missing. but i managed to pick a few. and then i promptly burned them. how the fuck does one burn sweet corn? it takes a high level of clumsy to master that trick. the currant tomatoes offer some consolation. they require no cooking and if they are sour i’m not to blame.