by dishpantheism

absurdly blustery today.  the moment i left off working and stepped out of the door a blast of wind came from behind and blew all of my hair forward over my face. most annoying. i drove to the overlook and watched whitecaps blow to shore. my car rocked with each blast.

weird dreams. weirder than usual. one in which i give birth to a beautiful baby but then feel horribly inadequate because of the state of my car. the new car i find to replace it has a very odd safety feature mandatory for all new automobiles. in the front seat there is a baby trough which molds perfectly to the shape of an infant and cradles it against harm in the event of a collision. i’m dubious but i set my baby down in the fleshy fimbriate seat. the car almost purrs with satisfaction. i drive away wondering how the seat will continue to cradle her as she grows. then a dream about vampires with iphones. they work as caterers and try to trap me at a barn dance. they’re extremely catty. and lastly a dream in which i climb mt. everest all the while insisting that i’m in the andes. at night i camp with my partner in the crevice of a rock face. it is required that all people sleeping on everest take a sort of lemony tea before hitting the hay. i don’t have any lemony tea so i wait until my partner is beginning to doze and i open one of his foil packets and inhale it. i don’t drink it. but i am caught smelling the tea and suddenly tip upside down. i can’t reorient myself no matter how hard i try. i sleep the rest of the night hanging by bungies upside down in my sleeping bag. the next morning i ride a llama down the far side of the mountain. the llama constantly lays over on its right side. i must tug on its halter to make it stand again. slow going. when i near the bottom i stop at one last overlook. i can see all of spain. then i notice flying (wingless) horses coursing the sky. each is marbled (in very unequine colors) like the endpapers of old books and black-maned. i covet the horses. suddenly i have one of my own. i ride over a wasteland which looks like the oilfields of the salinas valley. i swoop low to the ground and see my sister being harassed by a pony. it is stamping its front hoof on the ground. i’m mildly alarmed and use my knees to launch my horse toward it like a frisbee. i hover in the air. my horse lands. turns into a boy. and violently garrotes the pony who is now also a boy. i’m stunned. i begin taking photos of old trains whilst sobbing. i notice that in the reflection of the windows i suddenly appear very very old. the end.

and now it is certainly time for bed.

and so.